How To Not Go Into Debt At Christmas

     When I was a much younger Mom, I loved going all out for my kids during the Christmas holidays - toys, clothes, experiences, good food, all the things. But usually, by the time December 25th actually rolled around, I would be a bundle of nerves. It was because I had made some financial mistakes that put my family's well-being at risk.

Back then, I didn't have a large income (still don't to this day) and planning ahead was not my strong suit. I utilized lay-away programs at stores to do the bulk of my holiday gift shopping. But that also usually meant that I ended up not paying the rent in order to make the holidays 'magical' for my kids. I'm guessing that my older children, who are all adults now, can't even remember a single gift they received before the age of ten. I was risking our home in order to over spend.

Yes, I was the problem. Because I came from a childhood of poverty, I never wanted my kids to feel like they were too 'poor' to get good stuff for the holiday. This was one of the many facets of the unhealthy relationship I had with money.

Then, one year, a friend of mine was explaining her budget to me and there was a line that stated 'Christmas Club'. Curious, I asked her what that was. She told me that it was something her mother used to do and had passed along to her. 

Christmas Club was a bank and credit union marketed special purpose savings account. Customers would deposit a set amount of money every week into a savings account, and at the end of the year, they would get the money back at the end of the year for Christmas shopping. They fell out of popularity with customers as they often offered low interest rates and high fees.

The theory of the short-term savings account was a good one though. In today's financial circles, this would be called a sinking fund.

A sinking fund is a savings account dedicated to a specific expense that you know if coming. Like holiday gift shopping or a larger purchase you want to make.

I use sinking funds to save up for all purchases that cannot be paid for in cash out of my regular bi-weekly budget. I have funds in different savings accounts for:

• Holiday spending
• Car repairs, maintenance and new tires
• Large purchases like new mattresses or appliances
• Vacations/Staycations
• Any special purchases

In my biweekly or paycheque budget, I set aside a pre-determined amount to be transferred over to the appropriate sinking fund account. When payday hits, I know how much to transfer and do this before paying bills. 

For my holiday budget, I estimate what I can reasonably afford to spend on gifts and extras - usually in the $1200 - $1500 range. I pick the higher amount as my goal, and divide by how many paycheques are between the time I start (usually in January) and the goal date (usually first week of December). It usually ends up being around 24 pay days, and I subtract a couple because, you know, life happens and I may not be able to put the money in on one or two occasions.

So, $1500/22 = $68.18 per paycheque to save. I'll either round up, or down, whichever makes the most sense, so for this example rounding up to $70 per paycheque seems about right.

If I save $70 at least 22 times, I will have $1540 in cash available for holiday spending.

What I end up doing is adding extra to it when I get any amount of money coming in that I wasn't expecting - a tax refund, a cash rebate, the Toonie I found in the parking lot. Anything that will get me to that goal faster. 

But even if I don't add anything extra throughout the year, and I am able to consistently save $70 per paycheque, I know I will have enough money by the beginning of December in order to do my holiday shopping.

Which is much smarter than not paying my rent for a month, and then taking months to catch up.

Do you use sinking funds for the holidays? Have you ever tried this method? Let me know in the comments.

Life Happens While You're Busy Living It

My husband is officially unemployed. 

We've known for months that his warehouse was closing, and the product they distributed was going elsewhere. We've had months to prepare for this. But it's still a bit of a shocker.

The end date for his employment was supposed to be October 31st. Yesterday, they started offering early release to those who showed an interest in it. My husband was the third person they spoke to. 

Hubs had been unhappy for years at his place of employment - a series of things that were unfair, and just not right. All to ensure that the company continued to make a profit. His supervisor started changing toward Hubs, and damn near became a tyrant by the end. They wanted him to quit, and they tried every method they could to get rid of him, but he never did. They tried to set him up to do something that they could fire him for, and that never worked either.

Most of his co-workers were so frustrated, they just walked away. Without the severance package, or the retention bonus, just as the company planned. My husband refused to let them have the satisfaction of him just walking away, and them not paying him. So he stayed.

Until yesterday.

It will be a couple of weeks before his severance is paid out, along with the vacation time owed to him, and that retention bonus. In about a month, he will be contacted about his group RSP and we can move those funds to our bank.

Being down to one income will likely make our budget so tight it squeaks, but we have money in our Emergency Fund to fill any little gaps that might happen. We are fortunate in that respect.

Hubs has a plan to take some down time for himself and to do some thinking on what he might want to do next. We are at an age when getting a new job could be a bit tricky because we are less than 15 years away from retirement. 

We are so fortunate to able to handle this bump in the road without much stress. In fact, him not going to the warehouse lowers his stress level. We will take this season of uncertainty in stride and put the plan we have into action.

We will get through this.

Down to one income a mere six days before our one year wedding anniversary. How interesting life can be.

The Journey to $100 K

 I recently watched a video where the vlogger talked about how a person's net worth increases faster once they have achieved $100,000 in savings. The reason for that is that money makes money.

Thinking about having $100 K in capital has the potential to change the trajectory of the future for my family and the future generations. Having $100,000 would open up many opportunities.

Let's be honest here; I have no illusions about becoming a millionaire or anything like that. But having $100,000 could do a lot for me, my spouse, my kids, and my grandkid(s). Those of us who are not born into financial wealth cannot fully benefit from our 'money making money' until we reach certain financial milestones, like having $100,000 saved. When this milestone has been reached, it gets easier to build financial wealth.

Here's what I could potentially do with $100 K:

• Have enough capital to secure funding to open a business
• I could partially retire
• I could have the financial backing to switch careers
• I could volunteer to causes that are important to me
• I could gift the cost of post-secondary education to my grandkid(s)

There is so much that would be possible with that level of capital - the opportunities are endless!

But before I can plan to utilize that money, I must first save the money. I have a reasonably stable job that I enjoy, with a reasonable income. Earning around $60,000 per year, I could possibly earn and save $100 K over the next 10 to 12 years.

The Plan to Save $100 K

Step One: Calculate how much I would need to save for a specific time period. 

• Using a 15 year goal, I would have to save about 11.5% of my annual income, or around $575 per month.
• Using a 10 year goal, I would have to save about 17% of my annual income, or around $850 per month.
• Using a 20 year goal, I would have to save about 8.5% of my annual income, or around $425 per month.

Step Two: Choose which goal I intend to use.

    With the state of the current economy, finances are tight for everyone. Just because we are good with money doesn't mean that inflation doesn't affect us. However, I do know that if I aim for a higher savings rate, like 17%, I am more likely to save more than if I aimed for 8% savings. 

With that being said, I am going to aim for 15% of my income, which equates to $750 per month.

Step Three: Calculate and Allocate the monthly amount.

    Looking at my monthly statements, I have determined that I am saving $480 per month currently in various savings, investment and retirement accounts. It would be ideal if I could save $750 per month over and above my current savings, but I think it would be better to include current savings for the time being. As I increase the savings amount, I will get a 'win' once savings reaches the $750 per month goal, and I will feel more accomplished - then I can tackle increasing to the $750 amount above current savings amounts.

    Based on my current amounts, I will the have to budget in an additional $270 per month. This will certainly tighten my budget significantly and may take some adjustments along the way. I don't want to set myself up for failure so I may not allocate the full $270 immediately, but make some incremental increases toward that amount.

Step Four: Automate

    The easiest, least painful way to reach my savings amount is to make it automatic. I can set up pre-authorized transfers of cash from my chequing account into one of my investment options. There are two choices: 

1.   I can have a certain percentage or dollar amount taken from my paycheque and deposited into my workplace retirement account before I ever see payday. 
2.  I can set up an automatic transfer from my chequing account to my investment account outside of my retirement funds.

To be entirely honest, I am leaning toward putting the additional funds to my non-retirement investment account. The reason being that should something unexpected happen, I would possibly need to access these funds. The workplace retirement pension account is locked-in and inaccessible in an emergency.

By automating the transfers, I won't have to think about it and it will happen even if I am not paying attention to my accounts that day or week. Again, the easier it is to do, the more likely it is to happen. 

Step Five: Budget the amount.

    This may be the hardest part of the process. I will have to go through my budget to 'find' two hundred and seventy dollars to allocate to investment savings. Typically, I would start with variable expenditures like groceries, or eating out. Considering the current economy and the high costs of everything these days, this may prove to be difficult to do right away, and will be even more difficult to maintain month over month. 

    Thank you for reading this far, and if you feel so inclined, I would love if you would leave a comment to let me know that someone is reading my little blog. I will try to post an update in a couple of months to let you know how it's going.

- Auntie

The Pen that Pierced My Heart

Yesterday, my day started out fabulous.

Until it wasn’t.

A medical appointment that was booked months ago, and confirmed two business days in advance, was supposed to happen.

But it didn’t.

 

For whatever reason, the administrative staff at said medical facility had called all other persons to reschedule due to the doctor being on vacation. Except me. The little box with my name in it on their schedule calendar was covered by another little box saying the doctor was taking vacation. They didn’t see it, so I didn’t get a call.

 

An inconvenience to be sure. But I was about to let it ruin my day. Instead, I decided that some retail therapy was in order.

Mindful of my ability to spend large quantities of money that I would soon regret, I opted for the dollar store (where everything isn’t a dollar anymore).

 

As soon as I walked in, I was greeted with the newest displays of back-to-school items. All the pens, pencils, notebooks, journals, and office items that makes my heart go pitty-pat.

 

I found gel pens that wrote with coloured ink. I found black ink pens, with cushions for comfort when writing, in all the soft colours I adore. There were felt-tipped markers in bold colours that I like using when I need to edit documents. Erasable pens too, which are great for writing in my journal and notebooks (because sometimes my brain is faster than my hand and I tend to make mistakes). Using pen and paper when writing does something for me. I must purposefully slow down my thoughts to make the words on paper somewhat coherent.

 

The composition books further down the aisle were displayed in an array of colours and patterns that made it difficult to choose. I found journals with contemporary quotes of encouragement, praise, and wisdom. There were notebooks of differing shapes and sizes, both coil-bound and stitched. There is something to be said about a blank journal or notebook, eagerly waiting for a story or memory to be painted upon the lines and pages in ink.

 

I am a sucker for a beautiful blank notebook or journal. Especially if the page edges have been gilded or deckled. Instantly, my mind wanders to the story that I could put in between its lines, maybe a romantic tale or something dark and full of doom and gloom. I have imagined myself an author, a write, spending countless days in a sun-filled room, at a desk, tales pouring from my imagination through my fingertips. Tasteful sketches of flowers, leaves, and insects adorn the corners of pages throughout marking the moments where I mindlessly doodled while I let my mind work through the next section of the story. A steaming mug of tea steeps nearby, and the dog snores softly on the rug near my chair. This is where the magic happens, where it all takes place. Kingdoms are built, and chance encounter romances become love stories for the ages. I pause thoughtfully, considering where all the copies of my books are – homes of gentle readers, in the laps of people sitting under the trees in a park, in the lunch or laptop bags of working folks, or the to-be-read stacks of the voracious readers among us. I wonder how many of those who read my books are fully able to immerse themselves in the story, like I often do when I am reading a thriller, a mystery, or a steamy romance novel? Do others find that they are able to completely escape their reality and find themselves surrounded by the world I have created for them with my words? Are the younger readers able to see themselves as the hero/heroine of the tale, regardless of their sexual identity? Does it help those who have little imagine a life filled with abundance and excess?

 

Those are the kind of stories I wish to write.

 

And so, I take the brand-new pen, and the new notebook, and I put the pen to paper.

 

And I write.

I Love You

 If you have ever had a tattoo done, or know someone who has, you probably know that most tattoos are a symbolism of someone or something. They serve as reminders of a lost love, or loved one, a pet, a favourite movie or musician, or of a time when the tattooed person had a significant life event.

The other day, a friend posted on their social media asking others to show their tattoos, their favourites in particular. Of course, I posted the tattoo I have of my mother's printed words to my dad.

From about the age of 4 or 5, until I was nearly twenty years old, I was blessed to have my dad in my life. I never referred to him as a step-parent, as he taught me, because steps are something you walk on - and you don't walk on people. He taught me that I could love more than one person as a father figure because each man - my dad and my father - brought different perspectives and teachings into my life. He was not the kind of man to teach me to have contempt for the man who fathered me, and had done so much good for my family. 

When he died, he left me heart broken. I did not know how to live in a world without him. My grief was raw, deep and excruciating. Those first years following his death were some of the worst years of my life. After his funeral, I packed away the package from the funeral home that contained the cards from any floral tributes, remaining obituary cards, and other cards we had received along with the book - the register that people sign to let the family know they attended the funeral. 

In the medium manila envelope containing all the cards and envelopes there was one that caught my eye. The enveloped was addressed to 'Pop'. I recognized my mother's handwriting. Even as a youth, I realized that she too was heart broken, having lost the love of her life. To protect whatever private message that might have been shared, I never opened the envelope, tucking it away with the others.

Over the years, I have opened that box of memories, re-reading the messages from family and friends, reminding me of how loved my dad was. His quiet way had touched so many people. And his death at the early age of 55, really resonated with a lot of people.

When my mother passed away 11 years later, I was given a similar box and package from the funeral home, also containing the manila envelope and her book of signatures and well wishes. Once I was home, I placed her package on top of dad's, together in the same storage tote in my closet. I wasn't as heart broken when my mother's death made me an orphan at the age of thirty; I was just lost. My grounding compass, my parents, were no longer there to guide me. 

Some 20 years later, I was preparing to move to a new home, and had started the obligatory purge of things no longer needed from the backs of closets. Items that I no longer had any memory of why I had saved them in the first place made their was to the dumpster area of my apartment building. I wanted to move into my new home with less attachments to a past that no longer served me or my family, so I threw things into the trash without a second thought.

Until I got to the tote containing those funeral home packages. I opened them, reread all those messages of well wishes from people who are now just names on a page with vague memories associated to them. Until I got to the white envelope addressed to Pop. I shared with my children the story of how he became my dad, and how loved he made me feel despite all the trauma I lived with as a child at the hands of my mother. I cried as I told my family how much I still miss him. 

And then, thirty-one years after his death, I opened the envelope for the first time.

The card inside may have had some flowers on it, it may have had a pre-printed poem. I really don't know. What I do remember is the printed words inside it, written all those years ago by my mother. 

" Kunoluk:wa "

And underneath:

" Kaluynti "

In the language our ancestors spoke she had written, " I love you " and had signed it with her name given to her in the longhouse - her real name. Not the government name she was burdened with, but the name that spoke to who she was as a person. My memory of its meaning is hazy, but it means something to do with how when corn was harvested and the stalks were grouped together, in a standing cone shape, to allow the cobs to dry, but could withstand the wind and not be knocked down.

You see, my dad was a teacher, part of the effort to revitalize the Onyota:ka language as it was determined in the 1980's to be a language in danger of being lost. My mom, had learned this language from her parents as that is what was spoken at home while she was growing up. Although she never disclosed anything to me personally, I do know that my mother attended Mt. Elgin Industrial School (an Indian residential school) and during those years, lost her language. Pop was helping her to relearn to speak - to give her her voice back. 

Many nights, the two of them would sit at the dining room table over coffee, and talk. About anything and everything. I would fall asleep in the living room to the sound of dad's voice, repeating phrases over and over again to her, with her whispering them back. I remember when they first started doing this how scared she was and me wondering why she would be afraid. But I was too young to ask the right questions, and she would never tell me about her experiences.

Those two words, printed inside a card, reminded me of the amazing love that my parents shared - one I was witness to. Love that could overcome traumatic experiences, ruined innocence, and the attempt at genocide cloaked in the word 'assimilation'. Love that knew no bounds; not time or space or distance. Love that couldn't be clouded by repressed memories, scars, or addictions. Love that taught me how to treat people we care for, and that we all have responsibilities to one another. 

 

Book Review - Looking for Smoke by K.A Cobell

 

 

A fictional tale that brings forward real-life issues among Indigenous peoples on Turtle Island, told from the perspective of youth living on-reserve. One teen girl is missing, another murdered, and everyone is suspect while a community grapples with missing and murdered Indigenous Women and Girls. Touching on many factors that are too real in many First Nations communities – alcoholism, drug dependency, family violence, abandonment, multi-generational households, the author weaves a tapestry of stories told from differing perspectives, four teens, who are all trying to find out what happened to their friends and relatives.

 

I really enjoyed reading this book, through all the different voices of the youth. It highlighted what life can be like on reserve for many in today’s world. While somewhat disappointed in finding out who the killer is/was, I felt that the story could have ended differently, as it often does for many families of MMIWG – not knowing what happened to their loved ones. While these murdered young women’s killer is apprehended, I feel that the character of their killer does not correlate to what happens in real life.

 

The descriptive writing was powerful and allows the reader to envision all the action as it is happening.

This is a must read for your 2024 Reading List written by Indigenous Authors.

Circles and Cycles

    You know that phrase, "Think outside the box"? It has been used by many people to encourage others to find unconventional solutions to a myriad of problems. I'm not sure of its origins, but I know I have heard that phrase many times in my life. It makes me think of another phrase, "Putting a round peg in a square hole". I'm not fond of that one, simply because that is how I have always felt. Like a round peg trying to conform myself to fit into a space that doesn't fit; one that doesn't accommodate me. A place where I don't belong.

    I was at a conference last month, among a group of Indigenous people who were all there for the same reason - using our shared knowledge and experience to look at innovative methods to increase housing stock for Indigenous people. One of the speakers urged us to stop thinking outside the box, and to start thinking "Inside the Circle". This was a profound moment for me.

    In Indigenous cultures (and yes, there is more than one), everything is typically viewed from a circular perspective. Mother Earth is round, the Medicine Wheel is a circle, Moon cycles, life cycles, everything fits in a circular way. We sit in circle when we hold ceremonies, we hold circles for healing, the drum is circular.

    Searching back through some older stuff, I found a blog post I wrote fifteen years ago. It started out something along the lines of, " If I want to be a write, I must write - so I am starting this blog in order to write, hopefully daily". How interesting that I still feel the same way all these years later. I have started blogs, books and articles and never really did anything with any of them. In the cycle that is my life, I have come back to blogging as a place to house my writing, although I feel more serious about it now. Back then, I was always thinking of writing as a means to an end - a way to create an income, and not for the process of it. If you read anything I wrote all those years ago, you may be surprised to know that I am still working, I still have a love for reading, and I still love to knit, although now those 'hobbies' don't get as much of my time as they used to. 

    I have newer interests that I am exploring - gardening, which is another life long love of mine, and supporting non-profit organizations by volunteering on Boards. I find I get really passionate when discussions turn to the topic of Indigenous Housing and Financial Wellness. I still love to share my experiences with others, hoping to provide them some guidance. 

    The cycle that is my life is rounding a new area, yet I have circled back to writing and this blog. I hope you enjoy it.